I have to be honest with you. Sometimes I suck at being a Christian. Some days are harder than others and I find myself disappointing myself and my Lord.
When I sat down to write this article, it weighed so much on my heart that I felt I must share. If I feel this way, then maybe perhaps other fellow Christians may also.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not having a bad day, depressed or have had something bad happen to me. I just feel that I haven’t been doing enough as a Christian lately. I also don’t want to offend anyone when I use the word “suck” but there’s no other way to state the obvious.
Have you ever felt this way?
Here’s my story
God has blessed me to live the life that most admire, cherish and want. I have a great husband of almost 24 years of marriage, a son who is pursuing his journalism degree in college (yes he’s following in his mom’s foot steps), great love of friends and family, great career as a real estate agent and a self published Christian author/writer.
Sounds great! Perfect little life. Right?
But I still feel something is disconnected or missing. Why? Well, sometimes the answer is not so simple.
Here’s the problem: I am not evangelizing my faith everyday. I am not reading or sharing God’s word everyday. I am not praying everyday. I am not loving my neighbor everyday. I am not fellowshipping with God everyday. I am sinning every single day. I suck… Now you get it? See below –
I. Want. To. Be. A. Perfect. Christian!
Now here’s the truth
Jesus never asked or required for me to be perfect. He just asked me to follow Him.
“Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.” Matthew 16:24
Jesus knew that we would fall short as Christians. Jesus knew that we were sinners that would die an eternal death without him. Jesus knew that Satan would throw us curve balls through temptation, deceit and lies. Jesus knew we would literally suck at life. But the word says…
“For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:10
So guess what?
Jesus chose to come, live among us and ultimately die for us – so we would experience life eternal with him ANYWAY.
How to un-suck today
God loves me and you so much that he chose to die so we wouldn’t have to experience these feelings of inadequacy. His word is his promise and example to us of how to live the best life he has planned for us.
When we get down on ourselves or feel as though we aren’t doing enough for him, is when he does his best work. When we decide that it’s best to give up and just say “forget this” is when he comes closer and whispers “you can and will do this!”
I’m happy that I serve a God who hears and understands our pains, emotions and despair. When I feel that I don’t measure up, he quickly corrects me and says “why are you comparing yourself to others?” And then I quickly understand that feelings of “sucking” usually comes from “comparison thinking and lack of faith in the process.”
We must stop comparing ourselves to what other Christians are doing and do what God has told us to do. He’s given all of us at least one gift to use in his Kingdom and most of us probably experience an abundance of more! I know I have. 🙂
As I come to the conclusion of writing this article, I find that I’m in a better state of mind than when I first started. God has a way of using my writing also as therapy 🙂 What I preach to myself is a personal testimony – that perhaps will help you as well.
My prayer is that if you feel that today or any day is a “sucky” kind of day – realize that maybe God planned it that way. Maybe he’s trying to tell you to slow down, take a breath and talk with him. Enjoy his presence. Enjoy life – no matter what happens. He has much that he wants to talk with you about….
“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11
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